I have a new piece in Hard Crackers contextualizing the 2003 Rikers Island Art Heist, undertaken by four exceptionally brazen – and apparently, inept – high-ranking jail guards. The story has since been recounted as a tragicomedy of "stupid crooks," and surely the shoe fits. But I argue it offers a more fundamental lesson about the nature of truth in carceral facilities, and its relationship to the violence that structures daily life for incarcerated people.